Guess what today was my last day of treatment!!!! Officially. I don’t have to go back to the Dr. for 3 weeks, in which she will do an internal exam and then I will meet with Jeannie Shildler they Gyno Oncologist and she will exam me….and in 3 months I will go back for a PET scan to see if there is any evidence of disease….Hopefully there won’t be but if there is then they would probably do a surgical proceedure called extrafaschial hysterectomy…which is a less invasive surgery than a radical hysterectomy. So I completed 5 Chemo treatment, 28 external radiation treatments, 1- 60 hour intracavity implant (internal radiation that included 4 day hospital stay) and a 4 treatment external radiation boost to my lymph nodes.
I have gone through things that I never thought that I would have to or be able to endure. But you know what I did it and I am really kind of proud of myself! Also, Larry, myself and my Mom are pretty well versed on Cancer and all the lingo that goes along with it….I can tell you all the acceptable ranges for blood levels…..I have learned tons about medications and what they are used for…and most importantly I am so excited to get back to living. It is really weird because It’s kind of like you don’t know what to do with yourself….even though I am feeling better I am not completely well and they stressed to me that I need to ease back into my life and not over do it…..they said it would be 8 weeks before I would feel like I did before treatments….
So I am done with my treatments and am so happy! I hope to return to work the week after Thanksgiving and just take it slowly. In the meantime I am going to start walking and building up my strength so that I don’t get a case of chicken stick legs…gotta have some muscles on my legs!!! Plus I need to let my WBC count levels to go back up to acceptable levels.
Thank you all for your support and well wishes and prayers….I felt them all and really appreciate all your generosity and love. I can’t wait for Thanksgiving…it is my favorite holiday! Family and good food!!!!
Well,
I am going to go rest for a bit and then get up and be productive…for a bit…then rest for a bit….and so on and so on!!
I just got my bill for my hospital stay….guess how much? $31,000.00 Just for 4 days!!!!! Cancer isn’t cheap thank goodness for insurance! Those bills make the other ones kind of nice and seem small….IPL, Gas, Water, etc….all decent….but not one bill for almost as much as I make a year! Yikes!!!
Oh well I would pay monthly for any amount of time to be cancer free so bring on the bills…..they really don’t matter….I just want to be here to pay them :) and I am pretty sure that I will be….I have a good feeling about my treatment! I am very happy for it to be over and I am anxious for that 3 month mark when i have to have a PET scan…I may have to take some anti anxiety meds before that scan…they really can make you nervous!!!!
Hopefully my next posts will be about what I am doing not going through!
Lisa
Hello everybody….I am bored….and tired of being tired! I want out of my bubble….it is unbelievable how sore you can be from laying in bed for 4 days straight…I thought I would never be strong enough to walk again…but I can again on my own. I am trying to get up and get back into a normal routine…I try to have a task that I know I can complete and do it….right now those tasks are I am going to brush my hair, clean my face, brush my teeth….so that I feel like a person. They are going to do 3 more radiation boosts to my lymph node to make sure that it gets completely treated. I go on Tuesday @ 8:30 they are going to take my blood then we have to wait for the results and then we will see if I can get the treatment….after that I should be done for a little while…when I left the hospital my White Blood Count was at 1……which is really low. Thus the bubble life…..
The brachytherapy treatment was so isolating and emotionally draining….It was probably the worst 4 days ever…It is not good to be alone and that treatment is proof…I have never been so glad to have my vitals checked because that meant that 2 nurses would come in for maybe 5 minutes…..Larry sat in the waiting room for like 3 hours so that he could sneak in when they checked me….he got to stay for only the 5 minutes…he said he didn’t care about getting radiated and he would sign whatever if he could just stay in there with me….I so wish that he could have…as soon as the implants were out my parents and Larry couldn’t get there fast enough…I was so glad to have my door open and to have people in the room with me. I want to walk in there when I am all better and thank the nurses they were so kind to me and I dont know if I could do their job. I can’t imagine going about normal everyday life….it has been so long that I think I have forgotten normal…or the normal me….how carefree just to wake up and have energy and take a shower and go to work…or take the girls to grab dinner….go to Kohls..or be able to take care of my kids completely….I cannot wait to do these things again….I am tired of seeing the drab face in the mirror…the puffy cheeks and bags…I want shiny hair, a Florida tan I want to go to the grocery store! I want to cook good meals…These are just some of the silly mundane things that you all do that I can’t wait to do again!!!!! How long until I get there? Who knows…..but I am doing everything in my power to make it back to that place!!!
I was looking over my antibiotics that they put me on and one of them is used to treat Antrax..wow….must be pretty strong stuff! That’s good to know in case there are any Anthrax scares in the area…I am covered! Haha…I have a whole buffet of medications.
Well I am going to try to get comfortable here and watch survivor on Demand….My left butt cheek is killing me from the 4 day bed extravaganza…and that’s the way I face to watch tv…I will have to get creative and maybe change directions of something….aren’t you glad I told you about my sore butt cheeks? I am all about sharing!
Lisa
Hi Everybody….Just wanted to post to let everyone know that I am home and finished with the internal radiation….It was not fun….Here are a few highlights…..The power went off in the hospital at 3:00 am to 12:00 am the next night…so not only are you alone in the room but I was alone with no TV to watch….I had to have a blood transfusion because my Hemoglobin levels were so low…..I won’t elaborate on the rest…I don’t want to dwell on it…I did it….It’s done….I hope none of you ever have to do it…
Thanks to all of you that were thinking of me….Thanks to my Mom for letting me cry on her shoulder and Larry too….and the nurses….and the Doctor…..I cried just a little bit over the last couple of days…The nurses all took great care of me….I got to go under general anesthesia for the first time…that is crazy to wake up and have the proceedure be done…I was glad I was not awake…at least for the first 90 minutes out of the 4 days….
Today is Julia’s 14th Birthday!!!!! Happy Birthday Julia….My WBC level is at 1 right not…so we are going to celebrate soon but she is with Grandma & Grandpa…so if you want to call her and wish her a happy bday go ahead!!!!
Getting off here…Glad the last 4 days of my life are over with…..
Love,
Lisa
Ok…I added some family photos to my Flickr….they range from 2002-2009….I can’t believe that so many people have read this blog…..Hi John Milspaugh!!! I haven’t talked to you in ages! I remember you teaching me that cool piano duet when I was little….and somewhere in a piano bench with all our music we still have the music that you wrote out for me! I also wanted to say Thank you to you all that have sent me cards…I have this journal that I keep that I write down what I eat each day…what medications I take each day and there is a pocket that is in it…I put all the cards in there and when I want to smile I just get them all out and read them!!! I heard from Jenny Hemsley and It was so nice to hear from you! You are right Katie, You and I were like sisters when we were little and I loved it when you guys would come over and play…which was all the time! That was so fun…do you remember when we used to put that beanie on Katie and she would go crazy! Anyways…I love to look at other peoples pictures so I just put some of the girls and some of our family stuff….so you can look…….anyways it is very heartwarming when you guys make comments on the blog or send me a note….it’s nice to know that you are interested in my journey! Even some of you that I may not know…..I have found some blogs about other people’s cancer journey and you get sucked in….I want to know every detail because it’s nice to hear that others go through the same stuff!….Well I am getting hungry…my appetite is increasing…that’s a good thing and even better….the food is starting not to taste like metal and it’s tasting like it is supposed too!!!! I have lost 20 pounds since I first found out in Sept. that I had Cancer…..Wow…I could give Jenny Craig a run for their money….but trust me I could have used to loose a few pounds but I would gladly go to weekly meetings rather than have cancer!
Oh yeah Thanks Jenna….she made all kinds of Yummy goodness for Halloween and shared with us! I also had a beautiful bouquet of flowers on my porch waiting for me when I got home from the Dr. today….They are so pretty!!! They were from my friend Stephanie and that was so sweet! I am just so lucky! To have all of you!
Love,
Lisa
I went to IU today for a blood work up and had to wait for about an hour for the results to come back..I had to wear a mask because my levels are low…..It was very attractive. Dr. Cardenes told us to go upstairs and find a comfy spot and to come back down to radiology in about 45 minutes…So Larry and I found a quite couch where there were no people and I layed on the couch with my head in his lap and took a nap while we waited.
The results came back and the white blood cell count was lower than Monday….but my Magnesium levels had come up because I have been taking a prescription that they had called in for me….So Magnesium Good….WBC (white blood cells) not so good…nor are my platlettes…(blood clotting stuff?)….She told me not to do things were I could harm myself because I can bruise easy, get infections and if I would cut myself bleed more than usual….So see I really do need to be in a bubble….she also said that if I develop a fever I need to go to the IU emergency room right away!
So to remedy the low WBC count I got a shot of Neupogen today and I have to have it for 3 more days after today. Then they are going to check my blood work on Monday to see if my levels are high enough to go through with the internal radiation on Tuesday. Larry was going to be able to just give me the shot from home but when we went to get the prescription filled there were some issues….which have been an ongoing problem….first the pharmacist said it was kind of expensive….then he said he would have to order it and it would be there by 11:00 tomorrow….then when he tried to bring it up to see what it would cost after insurance…he said insurance doesn’t cover this and that I need a pre-authorization from my Doctor…well is it me or when a Doctor writes a prescription that usually means that she has authorized it? I guess not…..Anyways the 3 shots would cost us $980 (somewhere in the $900 range)….So we are just going to go back to the hospital each day and get the shot….after insurance it would have been $398 …but we had a problem with another medication that I was supposed to have during my treatments that I didn’t get because it had to go through mail order and all this other stuff….and I have to have these shots…..I can’t wait on Anthem to figure out if they want to pay for it or not…..or figure out when I will actually get the medication….
I have heard more people complaining about just trying to get simple medications to help them deal with their illnesses…..I know that many elderly people also face these issues as we all will some day…..when you are dealing with illness it’s difficult enough…why do they have to make it harder! I guess I need to pay more attention to the health care stuff that is being tossed around by the government….it will matter to us all one day…
What is Neupogen?
Neupogen is a man-made form of a protein that stimulates the growth of white blood cells in your body. White blood cells help your body fight against infection.
Neupogen is used to treat neutropenia, a lack of certain white blood cells caused by cancer, bone marrow transplant
, receiving chemotherapy, or by other conditions.
My Doctor did say that that the drop in the WBC after treatment is not unusual and that many people encounter this before they finish their treatments….She said it was just a result of my treatment…since I have been receiving radiation on my pelvic region there are many large bones so many of the good white blood cells have been destroyed from the chemo& radiation …..they just need time to bounce back and since the radiaition is done they will begin to do that….along with a little help from the Neupogen.
Well I went for my last external radiation treatment today and rang the bell after!!!! Whoo Hoo….You have to ring it 3 times and I rang it loud…we actually had gone out to get the car from the valet people because I had to go have a EKG upstairs at the hospital….Larry said do you want to go ring the bell? I said yes so we ran down there and rang it….there were only 3 other people there…but who cares…I did my time….I am ringing the bell….
This weekend was really rough….I am feeling all of these things all at one time….tired, fatigued, anxious and emotional….I actually cried this morning at the thought of taking a shower…because I didn’t know if I could physically do it….this is where the fun hormonal stuff comes in I think because I don’t normally cry over showers. But that is how tired that I feel….I have just broken down several times because I just don’t know what else to do…sometimes crying just makes you feel better….Meanwhile I am wondering why I feel so incredibly bad…
So they didn’t do my bloodwork on Friday because we had already determined that I was NOT having Chemo today!!! They were going to do it today because Dr. Cardenes always wants to examine you on you last day so they also tested my blood levels and had me have an EKG ….So they call at 5 tonight to tell me that my White Blood counts are at 1.2 and should be at least a 4. something…..and that also my Magnesium levels are extremely low….They called in a prescription for a Magnesium supplement. So no wonder I have been feeling so horrible….They want me to come in on Wednesday again to have my levels checked. Meanwhile now I am at risk for getting sick and have a really high risk for getting infections, etc….so they said to keep me in a bubble….I have pretty much been in a bubble…but I guess a highly degermafied bubble…..Lysol is my new best friend….
So now I am the girl in the bubble….meanwhile H1n1 is running rampant and it’s flu season….come on White Blood Cells lets produce….I am going to look online to see how I can help these guys out….because I really need them….
So at least I know why I haven’t felt good…besides chemo/radiation & Cancer :) Haha…
Lisa
Hey if anyone clicks on Flickr on my sidebar under links. It is like my Doggie Blog….I got a Nikon D60 camera for my birthday this past year…and photography is a big big hobby of mine…The camera is awesome and since it is a public site I don’t really have alot of pics of the girls and stuff on there because just anyone could see them…there are some on there….There is a video of Lauren singing a solo at her 5th grade class’s USO show that they did for WWII veterans where she sang a solo….it is awesome wait till you hear her sing….she looks just like Grandma Ruth…If you click on the collections to the side you can see little thumbnails and one of them is a video….
I do have tons of pictures of the girls too they are just not on flickr….and I love to take pictures of my dogs…they don’t care they just love the attention…so if you want to check them out feel free…I just didn’t want you guys to think I was a crazy dog freak. (Ok I really am….Sammy and Shadow are awesome and they have been a big part of my recovery in helping me sleep on the couch for hours)…..and I wanted to make sure that you know that I really do have pics of my kids too….I need to find away to get some on here…but my files are too large! I want to personalize this blog…but I don’t understand widgets and all that other stuff…So sorry it just has to be boring!!!
To see the video click on Flickr ….click on Different things….Things I like and then click on the little picture that has a boy playing a trumpet and that is the video of Lauren singing.
Later!!!
OK…Here is the scoop on the internal radiation. Internal Radiation is the final radiation treatment in which they take metal rods and fill them with radiation and actually put them inside you directly on your tumor to wipe it out completely. I will have radiation sitting on what is left of my tumor for 48-50 hours. During this treatment I will actually be admitted into the hospital and be under anesthetic but will be conscious….(not sure how conscious)…
I will go on Monday the 9th for pre-op stuff where they give you stuff to clear out your system…..I guess this is all normal for when you go under anesthetic …not sure I have only had epidurals with the girls when they were born.
I think they are going to do a spinal block for my anesthetic because with this method they can keep me on a pain pump so that I am not in discomfort and when they turn it off it is gradual and you aren’t in pain like you are with general anesthetic because you are on a pain pump so you don’t wake up and feel horrible…you can just kind of adjust. I may meet with a some Dr’s next week to go over which way they want to go…my Dr. said with me being healthy and young…that they would probably go this route….It’s felt good to be called healthy and young :) Me??
So here are the sci fi details….I will be radioactive during the entire procedure so I will pretty much be in a leaded room and any time anyone comes into the room be it a nurse, Dr. family, friend, etc…they will have to turn my radiation off…..I will have to lay down the entire 3 days I will not be able to get up…I will have a catheter and they will give me Imodium so that I don’t have bowel movement….(this scares the crap out of me….well actually it will do the opposite :) Ha Ha…)…..I will be able to raise my head up to a 20 degree angle….I will be given a blood thinner so that there are less complications of blood clots and I will have to wear these leg compression socks with these compression boots that will squeeze my legs and keep blood clots from forming…I have heard that these are annoying….. They will use an ultrasound to get the metal rods exactly where they need to be…..and then they will stitch them into me so that they don’t move….Then they went over all these crazy things that could happen but that they say really never do…and had me sign a release to have the procedure….
It sounds pretty scary but I think that they also said that I would be somewhat sedated and probably not remember alot of it…which is fine with me….
November is always a crazy month….Julia’s birthday is the 13th, My Dad’s is the 14th, Lauren’s is the 17th so usually we are having birthday parties and doing much more fun things than having internal radiation….but I am doing this so that next year we can do all the fun stuff again! I will actually be in the hospital for Julia’s birthday…sorry Julia! Life will be going on while I am in there….Lauren has orthodontic appointments she gets colored rubber bands I think this time with a couple of new brackets….her teeth look awesome…I can’t believe how straight they are already…she got braces the day after school got out….so she has had them since May 28th…she really wants the colored rubber bands…I hope that she gets them this time.
So I really won’t be able to have any visitors….I don’t know if I will have a window to wave at anybody or what…so just send your prayers and good thoughts my way and don’t worry about coming down there….I don’t want to prolong it for any more time than it needs to be….I want to get it done and get out of there….
After that I am not sure exactly what the next step is….I see Dr. Cardenes next Monday and I am sure she will tell me what the game plan is…..I can’t believe that my last external radiation treatment is Monday…It has felt like groundhog day for the last 23 times…..I hope that the fatigue and tiredness let up….it has been brutal…..it really gets to you during the last week…..but whoo hoo it is the last week!!!! I am so excited!
So there is the low down on the crazy internal radiation called “Braechytheraphy”…not sure about that spelling….
Talk to you later!
Lisa
Hey guess what? I don’t have to have Chemo on Monday!!!! You know how upset that makes me? I have radiation treatments today, Friday and Monday is my last one! So the chemo is for my radiation and I only have one next week so the chemo Dr.’s and the radiation Dr.’s consulted yesterday and felt that it wasn’t really necessessary to put me through that….plus not having it will give my Blood cells more time to get back up higher so that I can handle the internal radiation better and have more strength. I can’t wait to have more strength….this last week is really the worst I have felt as far as just feeling really tired after doing anything….but it’s the last week and everyone that I have encountered in the radiation room says they are just kicked during the last week….like making a cup of coffee is a big deal….or getting up off the couch….it’s really annoying!
After your last radiation treatment there is a bell in the lobby that the Lions Club donated and you get to ring it…everyone that is around claps for you….I get to ring the bell on Monday! Yippee!!!! The Lions club has donated millions of dollars to the Radiation Department @ IU and that is the first sign that you see when you go down there to the basement….My Dad has always been in the Lions Club and has done their Fish Fry every year, I played softball for the Lawrence Lions for my entire youth..(shout out Stephanie….fellow cancer survivor and fellow softball player)…….My Dad happened to be talking to a friend of his at the concession stand where he was of course he was volunteering when we first found out that I had Cancer. I was still waiting for my Appointment with Dr. Moore the on the 22nd of September….anyways….this friend of my Dad’s is really big into the Cancer part of the Lions Club and put my Dad in touch with this Lady who is the Patient Advocate for Lions Club at the IU cancer center named Dottie Flack. My Dad called her and told her what was going on with me and she told him to get all my records send them to her she would show them to a Dr. and then she called me. She told me about Dr. Cardenes at IU and about IU and how incredible they were and she got me an appointment to see Dr. Cardenes in 3 days time….meanwhile I had been waiting 3 weeks…to see the other Dr. I ended up seeing Dr. Moore on the 22nd got his opinion and then going to IU the very next day and she gave me the same opininion….I feel that I was supposed to be at IU…..My Dad getting me there all the hard work that he has done over the course of his life with the Lions it just felt like I should be there…..So my whole point is that when ever I walk in to go to treatment I see the big Lions Club sign and it makes me think of my Dad and I am so glad that he helped me get in to IU for treatmtent! So when you have your fish sandwich at the Lawrence Lions fish fry give the Fish Man a hug….he deserves it. I think that it is a great testament that you get what you give….he (well both my Mom & Dad) will do anything for anyone and when we were faced with this horrible diagnosis we were given one of the best Cancer Dr’s and the Best Cancer facilities handed to us on a silver platter with Dottie who would call me and just talk to me and encourage me and who sat in the room with me when I was talking to the Dr. for the first time…So remember Good Deeds do not go undone!
I will post about the Brachytherapy later….I have to look at my notes….it is really not going to be fun…I don’t care I am doing it! I am going to be Radioactive and like it…one of the guys in the waiting room should take me night fishing with him when I am done! ha ha those guys are so funny!
Lisa
I am going to tell you guys about the IU Cancer Center and the people that I have encountered. Cancer is a horrible, horrible thing and no one wants to be diagnosed with it. But when you do get diagnosed you get a perspective on life that sometimes can be a blessing. You realize that you matter to people and how many people matter to you…..Things in life are not important….your car, your money, your clothes….irrelevant. But they seemed so important before! When you hear that you have cancer you just want to live and you want to fight with every ounce of your being to stay in this world for those that you love and yourself. My feelings from the beginning were that I have this….I can be miserable or be positive….I am a positive person so I choose to be positive. I can sit here and worry myself to death…or do what I can to get better. So I have been going to treatments trying to be positive…trying to be a good Mom…trying to “man up” (as a great friend who is a breast cancer survivor so perfectly described how she handled her treatment).
So at the IU Cancer center everyone there is in the same boat as you are. Everyone is fighting….everyone wants to just live…..everyone is facing hardship….but it is one of the most positive places that I have ever been. People are so real….people are so frank….so open…..it is what it is. We talk in the waiting rooms….we ask how are you feeling today….we talk about how we feel tired…how things taste weird….do you feel this way? Me too….. New people show up and people complete their treatment. There is a really nice couple from Richmond that the husband just finished up his radiation treatment and he has had Cancer for 10 years. The wife could always tell if I was feeling good or bad…she always smiles and the husband said they needed something to do today…so they may as well drive from Richmond everyday for some radiation treatment….he now is waiting to start on another clinical trial but he has to wait 3 weeks to recover from his radiation…..These two people smiled everyday at me, I now know how may kids, grandkids, and where all their kids live 
Larry usually is the one that talks to all these people while I am getting my treatment…..I walked into the little room it’s about 10×10 with about 8 seats in it…where you wait to get called for treatment…anyways…..Larry had all these men telling fish stories and laughing….it was like a little party….It was really nice to see them all laughing and happy….they all open up to him….so he gets to hear it all…sometimes maybe more than he wants to….but they all love him and so do I. It’s better to talk about it because sometimes the room can get a little depressing but when the poeple start talking and their personalities come out…it’s not a room full of people waiting for treatment its a room full of PEOPLE who are in the room who just happen to be going through cancer treatment and you learn about their lives and you are floored by what some of these people have gone through…..I think “would I be as happy as you are if I had been battling cancer for 10 years?” Hopefully yes! Of course I plan to be cancer free….so I am not going to go there in my mind…..I have wondered there in my mind and it’s not a happy place…so I left that state of mind really quickly.
That is one of the biggest things my nurse told me…she said you are not cancer….you are the same person that you have always been you are just going through this….are there going to be days when you don’t think that you can get up and come in here….yes….but you are going to do it. Just don’t loose your spirit and who you are….Her name is Sharron and she is awesome!
OK….It’s 8:00 a.m. and I am finally posting this one….it has been in draft mode for several days….It’s Doctor Wednesday today so I am showered ….never know when they will pop in a physical exam and it’s always nice to have your legs shaved and be clean! I have to go get ready…today they are going to tell me about my Braechytherapy I think….and I want to ask them about Menapause…because I am getting emotional looking at a bottle of water or crazy stuff like that….It is like PMS to the maximum…..so if they could help me out with that….I would be so happy….so please don’t call and be mean to me because I just might cry on you….Just Kidding….none of you would ever be mean!
Have a great day and I will post about the internal radiation stuff…..sci fi channel watch out.
Love
Lisa
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